This was written during the covid lockdowns - what disastrously misguided decisions they were! - and reflects my frustrated amazement as men's minds went mad. Joseph de Maistre wrote against the atheist and murderous French Revolution and is often bracketed with our own Edmund Burke (and how we can do with a revival of his thought!)
Another poem written in the same vein - which some might denounce as sour but others would recognize as clear-eyed if despairing - is "On Having an Evelyn Waugh Moment," written in December 2014 and posted here on 17 January 2019.
I woke in the morning feeling weird,
My God, was it covid? I scratched my beard:
And suddenly I hated unconscious bias,
And loathed all thought of the appallingly white;
Death to racists! Castration for sexists!
Patriarchy and capitalism were things of the night.
Oh no, it was beyond a joke,
I’d become woke!
I woke in the morning feeling strange,
My God, was it covid? Or a midlife change?
For my wrist was limp, and my voice it minced,
I ached for a toyboy with pecs like rumps,
And my jeans were tight, and my crotch it bulged,
My toupee was bouncy and I swished in pumps!
Oh Lord, what could I say?
I was gay!
I woke in the morning feeling faint,
My God, was it covid or some other complaint?
Softly warbling about gendered autonomy,
I stretched for my bra, suspenders and knickers,
Then I shaved, did my makeup and anguished about dresses –
I was meeting my group, “BoyzNowGirlz” (most of them vicars).
Oh curses, despite lacking a fanny,
I’d become a trannie!
I woke in the morning feeling off,
My God, was it covid? I had no cough,
Instead, snarl-faced and bulging-eyed vain,
I dreamt I was marching, chanting “Humans not Whores,”
And “Wages due Housework” before texting home
To check the au pair had swept all the floors.
Oh rats, I could have been a terrorist,
Instead I was a feminist!
I woke in the morning feeling ill,
My God, was it covid? I was hot then chill.
I checked my phone: the cities were fired,
Arson, looting and frenzy swirled in the streets,
Obese, fleck-mouthed zombies, blaming oppression,
Smashed their own neighbourhoods, exulting in tweets.
What the hell, with a clatter
I took the knee, screeching “Black Lives Matter!”
Dear reader, de Maistre was right:
Renouncing the Truth to dig a sump
Darkens day to night –
Where all will jump.
===============
© September 2020
